Haiku Monday!

Welcome!  The theme is not Tofu!  Only for a fleeting millisecond did it cross my mind.  Instead, here is your challenge for Monday.   Think about sound.

Tink, plink, clang, clink, ding, screech, clunk, clank, eeek, creak, donk, doink, rattle-rattle, thunk, rinnnng, bonk, boing.

Your theme is METALLIC SOUND

Let’s see what everyone can do with this.  This is such a diverse and creative group, I am really looking forward to your 17 syllable entries by midnight MST on Monday.  All standard rules apply.   A three line 5-7-5 format where the first line is 5 syllables, the second line is 7 syllables, the last line is 5 syllables.  The best haiku make use of both Kigo( seasonal reference), an’ Kireji (“cutting” word or punctuation ).  The goal is to join two separate images/emotions in one integrated verse.

You may enter up to 2 for judging; as many as you want for fun.  Please designate which one or two you want judged.  You can ask others which of yours they think are best before deciding which you want to make official.  Visuals are encouraged, fun, and may make a difference in a draw.  Have fun!

To leave your entry, use the leave a comment link at the upper left.  Don’t forget to leave a link to your visuals.

By way of how I got this crazy theme, here is an explanation.  Here is what a buck jumping a barbed wire fence with a pipe gate in it sounds like:  tink, squeak! CLANK-clunk, ding, ding, ding.  You might have thought he was silent and graceful, but not always.  Deer can be lazy, and may make only just enough effort to scrape over an obstacle they could actually clear by extra feet.  (This is not the most spectacular photo, having been shot pre-dawn, but it tells the tale.)

Translation: his hoof just hits the top wire making a tiny tink, then the wire squeaks lightly.  The vibration from his contact with the fence wire makes the pipe gate jiggle a little and the two halves clank together first loudly and then more muffled.  Finally the chains binding the gate halves together quietly ding as the energy dissipates through the loose links.

Can I make that a haiku?  Umm…

Springtime buck clears fence –

almost – but hoof brushes wire,

tink, squeak, clank, ding, ding.


51 Responses to “Haiku Monday!”

  1. Sure. Make it easy! Bwahahahah. Thank the Lordy you offered suggestions and a picture. *whew*. I think I need to start working on this NOW! :-)

  2. Boxer,

    You got dogs, so you got dog tags, you must have keys, everyone gets change. There’s car doors, targets, cans, buoys, boat things, parachute harnesses, roofing, bracelets. Just think about it.


  3. Great theme! I already have an idea. Now, to try to execute . . . Looking forward to it.

  4. Morning Moi. I see you are an early person, too. Looking forward to your entry.


  5. Good morning serendipity,

    Interesting topic. Just a quick one to say I’m in.

    Fusion’s low hiss
    So hot and bright as the sun
    Welders love of steel

    • Nice Karl!

      Having done some welding, I got it immediately. The hiss and hum, the clacking of heating steel, and the quiet patter of sparks, depending upon the welding method.


  6. Down slow and smokey
    with closed eyes he soars and squeals.
    Drinks clink, brass sax bawls.

  7. Wow! Already two great entries. Nice work Karl & Dan. I’m going to need to really pull something out of my hat to even be worthy of competition this week.

    Congrats on your win Serendipity, and great choice of theme this week.


  8. Curm,

    Excellent. This is a great start, and sounds I wasn’t even thinking of!

    (Curm, you may want to look at your post on the haiku – the comment button will not work – just sits there.

    CoryJo is right, there is already stiff competition. Cory Jo, looking forward to your idea of a metallic sound!

    This is going to be fun, but I can already see difficult to judge. Glad I kept it to only 2.


  9. I guess it’s a good thing that I live across the highway from a steel mill. And that it’s snowing right now. I’m in!

    Very interesting theme!!


  10. GG,

    Ah, Pueblo, of course, I had forgotten about the mill there. I believe the iron ore from the old Sunrise mine near Hartville, WY was hauled there for smelting. You ought to know something about metallic! Yeah, good luck with that storm.


  11. Yeah gran, It rained a lot on the north side too.
    I checked it and yeah you’re right. It won’t allow comments. I think I fixed it. Thank you for the compliment

    • Curm, your comment page still doesn’t like me :-(
      But, I wanted to tell you how much I love your haiku entry!

    • Sorry I can’t get on some of word press either. Can’t see gran’s. I thought since I had a blog on each I wouldn’t have probs. My pics are on my blogger. I’ try to put them on my word press too.

  12. Uncle an’ me sittin’ heah in hospital ( so they can tickle his heart one more time) an’ he be diverted an’ charmed by that pic of a handsome deer! Unlce say many a mornin’ he ain’t seen nuthin’ then all a sudden, TWaaaaaaaaaaaaang! A deer hits the top of the barbed wire fence.

    I asked him if BAM! BAM! Wuz metallic soundin’.

    Anyhoo, I’se tryin’ to git him to quit oogling the nurses an’ try to compose his own Haiku this weekend,

  13. Nebuchadnezzer’s Dream.

    Kingdom’s imploding.
    Gold-and-Silver crash-to-ground.
    Around feet-of-clay.

    Up with visuals/theories/alternate versions.

  14. Aunty,

    I had to laugh. Get that man busy writing. No reason he can’t write a few syllables. I have just provided a post on Artemis to provide him a little inspiration. There are all kinds of metallic sounds associated with gun operation no matter which action he has.


    Welcome. A well considered entry. Made me curious to go back and look up the feet of clay thing. Interestingly National Geographic recently ran a story on the King James Bible that reminded us how many English idioms came from bible verses. When you think about it, so many have no relevance in modern day vernacular.

  15. I will definitely be going the firearms route. COOL theme Serendip!! See you B’s Monday!!

  16. Good moring Serindipity,

    A training saying used when welding with MIG, If it’s popping, you’ve got nothing. Hear it hiss, welder’s bliss.

  17. Anon,

    Looking forward to your submittal.


    I like it – bubbles are bad. I would really like to try MIG – the results are so smooth. One of these days when I have spare time…maybe a class at the local community college. I have a friend who has a really nice setup, but he is 4 hours away.

  18. I’m up with visuals. Really enjoyed this one!

    Snow falls. Winter’s kiss
    muffles hot steel’s insistent
    clang. Hush! Steam rises.

    Silent hollow pipes.
    Nature exhales one soft breath.
    Perfect bell tones sing.

  19. GG,

    These are wonderfully different from each other. The mill photo is great! This game has had me chasing photos, too. I spent several hours trying to get a good moon shot one night – trying to figure out how to work the exposure and shutter speed for the best effect.


  20. I hung a wind chime
    In the tree by Mama’s grave.
    Love! Whisper’d in chime.

  21. So… my second haiku ever:

    Cutters slice crisp crusts
    Jingle jangles on broad backs
    Sleigh rides in the snow

    Visual at my place here.

  22. Up with visuals.

    Crunching tin foil chords
    wrestle tissue box backbeat.
    Rock on, Riot Grrrrls.

    Happy Haiku Monday and good luck everyone!

  23. Sultry night, he stalks!
    She wakes.  Intruder? Tschhhht Tschhhht
    Mossberg warns, “wrong house”

  24. Wow, go fix dinner, and look at all the haiku that dropped in when I wasn’t looking. What a variety of thoughts and sounds are dropping in.

    Fishy brings pleasant, thoughtful sound, Moi raucous, Scout blood chilling (if you are an attentive bad guy anyway). And Ponita brings us old-timey seasonal sounds. All great haiku and from so many angles. I never cease to be amazed at what everyone contributes!

  25. wind chime music played
    by soft finger breeze drifting
    through the open porch.

    I’m UP.

  26. She says “We are through”.
    The sound of living ends, as..
    the telephone clicks

  27. Ting! Ting! Ting! Of drops
    Natures harmonious song
    Rain on a tin roof

    I’m up … with visuals =)

  28. Here are two from me.

    Whirr, Whirr, Whirrr. Come on!
    It wants to start, it just won’t.
    Winter’s dead batt’ry.

    New car fever makes
    us kick the tires, move the seat.
    Best sound? Slam the door.

  29. My two haikus are up. Oops, thought it was noise, not sound, but I’m sticking with what I have. Do you want me to put them here as well?

  30. Chambering a round
    chinks home with satisfaction.
    Smokin’ metal high!

    Screech-slap, screech-slap, screeeeeeeech!
    This screen door cacophany ?
    Summer’s harbinger.

  31. The screen door slams shut
    Jangle of car keys in hand
    Young man new to streets

    There’s my 2nd one!
    In honor of my newly licensed son! lol
    (Get off the road! lol) =)

  32. I left mine at home (no really! Coco did not eat it.) I’ll be back later today….. these are all great!

  33. WOW! I reckon I’ll throw down may pair of 17-syllables and be on my way. Too good, just too darn good!!!

    Freedom Tunnel, NYC:

    Train clanks through tunnel
    Now gone shanties moan hollow
    “Freedom” left behind

    visuals up at: http://ramblingsfrommytyper.blogspot.com/2012/02/freedom-tunnel-nyc.html

    Crying Shame:

    Train clacks ‘cross the land
    BLAM! Mighty buffs laid to waist
    Injun sheds his tear

    visuals up at: http://ramblingsfrommytyper.blogspot.com/2012/02/crying-shame.html.

    Tough theme this week, but I do love a challenge. Unfortunately, so does everyone else…OYE, too GOOD!


  34. Good afternoon Serendipity,

    So many good ones, particularly the wind chimes. Adding another type of wind chime.

    Hear winter winds blow.
    Clang, clang, clang, went the Halyard.
    How quaint? I say not!

    Slap, click, metallic
    ring. Ten rounds ready to sing.
    Shooter’s chorus.

    I have to tell you, this is a heck of a topic. There are lots of metallic noises in my world. Plenty of food for thought.

  35. Here are my two entries:

    Begin with the breath:
    lungs squirm down the rabbit hole-
    hollow rasping snared.

    Caged birdie flushing–
    Beak flaps and taps rusted pipes-
    Superbowl Shuffle

    You may have to see the visuals, but these haikus are making a comparison from one image to another.

    Thanks. Visuals are up.

  36. Soft snow falls on tent
    gathering until too much
    crash! structure crumbles.

    yah, maybe I should have let Coco eat this one.

    Happy Haiku Monday!

  37. a mournful echo
    rust on rusty gate crashing
    into pear blossoms

  38. WOW, what a turnout. So many ideas; so much imagination; such creativity. The rush of haiku arriving is reminding me of a load of drill stem pipe sliding off a flatbed in a mountain curve! Whoa – lookout! bouncing in from every direction. It will surely be Wednesday afternoon-evening before I get these sorted and processed in my brain. So many good ones.

    Fishy already wins the prize for the most diverse from a single individual – from wistful windchimes to the sound of a round chambering. (Which 2 are official Fishy?)

    Karl also got into this with a lot of different metallic sounds, all familiar to the hostess. Which 2 Karl?

    The most frightening metallic sound so far is car keys in the hand of a teenage boy! Ha!

    Y’all can throw in more if the spirit moves you, but I’ll only judge 2 per person.

    Have fun, the night is still young.


  39. The hard part!
    I guess the last two.

  40. Not to throw a bunch of incongruity in here but, I’m curious, Other than my brother, you would know most about this. I Was waxing bowstrings and trying on wool to see how much I’d have to shrink by next Sept. (quite a bit) and I tried on my hunting boots. They were a Cabellas brand. I took a walk in them and noticed they started feeling funny. I’d only used them two seasons, and they were only about three years old. The foam treads had peeled away! I think I paid about ninety buck for them as they had goretex and 600 gram thinsulate. Ever have any experience with those? I’m thinking lace to toe hard Vibram is the only way to go. What do you wear?

  41. Okay, here goes another one. For some reason, I have winter on the brain… ;-)

    Frigid temps bite hard.
    Ear grating skree. Car door doth
    Complain too loudly.

  42. Wait!!!! Midnight MST? I’se gonna try to git one in—busy busy day.

  43. Aunty,

    Do you really stay up past 2:00 AM regularly?? Wow. I can’t I get up at 5:00


  44. Wow, what a turn out! Good luck with the judging Serendipity, I don’t envy you. I must admit out of all the themes this one seems to trouble me the most. I have so many Metallic sounds in my mind but nothing to put them with. Arrrggg!!! I’ve managed to come up with a couple of poems and some visuals which can be found at Monkeys & Windex.

    Click of the hammer..
    Snap of the trigger..BULLS EYE!
    “We have a WINNER!”

    Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
    Bells ring as the light goes on.
    Brilliant idea!

    Good Luck everyone!


  45. Serendipity, uhm…well, mor’n I’d like to admit. ‘Tis the onliest quiet time ’round heah. But I can sleep til 7, if I will.

    How does I find Aretmis? Doan see the link.

    What wunnerful entries this week–luvin’ the wind chimes of Jean an’ Fishy…Curmudgy’s soulful sax… gotta admit that Scout’s “wrong house” made me chuckle.We almost doan need no visuals ’cause the sounds these Haiku conjure in the mind is sensory enough.

    Well, now, these is hurried, but I let thangs slip up on me today.

    Visuals at http://ethercapacious.blogspot.com

    Muffled clink of coins
    riding in your pocket;”…Bye.”
    Gate clangs in green dawn.

    Dwong! Dwong! Throaty bells
    vibrate o’er Venetian bay-
    Spring break: Italy!

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